You get better feedback by asking for it

Ask for precise and specific feedback on a topic you’ve chosen yourself to work on. Then it’s easier for people to give you useful and concrete feedback, and it’s easier for you to receive it and use it to improve yourself.

Is it our biggest problem that people don’t read?

One tech professional told me once in a fit of frustration, “Elisa, the biggest communication problem this organisation has is that people simply don’t read.” But if we know for a fact that people don’t read, is that then a problem – or a fact of life that we need to adjust to?

Practice listening for five minutes every day

Listening requires practice and uses up energy. That’s why it’s a good idea to practice listening for five minutes every day. You’ll get more out of your practice if you choose beforehand which area of listening you’re going to be practicing, with whom and when.

Hanlon’s razor teaches us to interpret things better

People have a tendency to assume that anything unpleasant was done with malicious intent. However, Hanlon’s razor tells us, “Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by neglect.”

We fail at communication because we fear failing at communication

Because we fear that our communication might fail, we panic about our responses, we don’t admit that we don’t understand, we try to be too fast and always right. All of this takes the focus away from the situation and shifts it to ourselves. However, the answer can’t be found within us.

Knowledge doesn’t lead to action, so what can help us?

Feeling like the thing we’re doing is sufficiently important is key. It’s not enough to know it’s important; we must feel that it’s important. This is something that a good leader, trainer or therapist can help you with.