Sandi Metz’s useful and captivating keynote speech from RubyConf 2017 takes you from a simple question to an unexpected path.
If the other person clearly would need advice, but for one reason or another won’t ask for them, there’s a magical trick you can perform: ask permission to give advice.
We try to show that we care by giving advice. However when faced with a tough situation we rarely need advice. More often we need someone to be there without judging, pitying or advicing.
Yes, but… What if there needs to be a but? But what if the other person is simply wrong? What if I disagree completely?
Is it possible to overcome imposter syndrome? What is it anyway? Oscar Santolalla and I discussed the topic on his Time to Shine Podcast episode 132.
When I concentrate on my breathing I’m attached to my body which is attached to this moment. This is necessary starting point to be able to develop your thinking.
The developer feels rightfully frustrated or misunderstood if the customer answers whatever they want instead of the question that was actually asked.
We have two opposing need: the need for control and certainly and the need for creativity and uncertainty. Using both forces is a key to successful negotiations.
We blame to ease our discomfort and pain. In those situations innocent people might get yelled at about non-related things without any fault.
We would like to believe that our intelligence will help us change our world view based on facts. According to science it just ain’t so.